"So Called Problems"

Take all of your so called problems.

Better put them in quotations.

     While I am not a huge fan of his work, John Mayer has it correct this time. I have always said that everything is relative: pain, problems, happiness, values. Each person has his or her own outlook on life that shapes their views and experiences. Someone will always have bigger problems than you, and your problems will always seem much more important than other people's, it's how life works. The best we can do as human beings is to remember to look at everything through various perspectives and realize that everyone doesn't stand in the same position we do: Go on, step in someone else's shoes.  

    I have been wanting to write a blog about understanding the problems we face and being thankful for the blessings bestowed upon us, but haven't quite had the time or the material. I think I may be ready now. 


     It started a few weeks ago when I started spending more time with one of my beloved L5s. Tina had signed on to work as a research assistant with the same professor I am working for. Within the first few days of working together, Tina and I organized a work date to eat homemade spaghetti and watch a current documentary on the Attica Uprising. We spent time catching up on our own lives as well. Tina asked how I was feeling and if I was getting more sleep than before surgery. It took me a while to figure out what she could possibly be talking about. Then I remembered that prior to surgery in December, I was up every hour using the bathroom and when I was in bed, I was curled up praying that the cramps would subside just for a bit, so I could get a little bit of sleep. It seems like forever ago. I smiled at Tina and told her that sleeping was so much better, even if it was occasionally hard to fall asleep when my boyfriend was over because he snores. 


    My sleep problems were huge at the time. I felt awful and all I wanted to do was sleep, but I couldn't. It's only six months out, and I can barely remember it being a problem. It just goes to show that not only are problems relative based on the person, but based on the time. If I was still having sleep problems, however, I bet they'd be at the top of my list of grievances. 


    I also had the amazing opportunity to celebrate Tina's birthday with a lunch at Olive Garden, where I was the "token white girl." Growing up in Wyoming County, where there are more cows than people and the population is probably 98 percent white, middle class, heterosexual, English-speaking individuals, Tina's birthday lunch was eye opening. I have been exposed to a lot of different people through traveling abroad to Poland during my sophomore year of college and through just being in the collegiate atmosphere, but not this much. Tina herself is Taiwanese and spent part of her life living in Colombia (and Brazil, if I am not mistaken). She speaks English, Spanish, Portuguese, and probably another language. I love listening to her talk on the phone with her friends, two of which she brought with her. While their names and countries of origin escape me (and I feel like a horrible friend for this), they were both in the states learning English (and could speak really well) and knew various other languages. Our friend Leigh was present as well. While Leigh grew up in South Carolina, she spent time living in South Africa and also knows how to speak Spanish fluently. I told everyone I was at lunch with that I felt so sheltered and uncultured because I had only been out of the country once and knew only a bit of French (even after studying it for 9 years). Tina told me, "Girl, you're so young. You have so much time to travel and learn languages." It's true. Being uncultured and sheltered isn't a problem. Having friends who are cultured and worldly are a blessing however, and have encouraged me to change my "token white girl" status. Watch out world, here I come ((after law school, of course.)) 


     The real reason that I waited to write this blog was because I want to keep the blog based on my life with Crohn's, so I decided to wait until I was in the hospital again-- don't worry, this time it was planned. I went into the hospital on Tuesday July 12 for "closure of enterocutaneous fistula with small bowel, resection, and anastomosis." In plain English, I had one of my stomas sewn up and put back inside my abdominal cavity. Surgery went well and I was only in the hospital a few days. While my mom couldn't be there everyday all day, and my sister wasn't there at all (she's still in Kentucky doing research), my amazing boyfriend was there a lot (even agreeing to snuggle with me all night in my awful hospital bed one night). I was released Friday afternoon and my mom drove me right back to Buffalo. 

Chilling in the Hospital with Fritz (compliments of the boyfriend) enjoying Orange Ice

     My home health care nurse visited today and after I gave her my history, she suggested I had been through a lot and should write a book. I told her I blogged a bit. While I have been through a lot, it's all still perspective. Compared to a normal person (whatever normal may be), I have had to struggle. I have an amazing support system, however, and always get things to work out for me. For now, then, I am going to keep my so-called problems where they belong: in quotations.